‘He scatters kisses down her stomach, moving towards her wetness.’
Nervously, I turned the page of my erotic book as my cheeks turned a deep shade of red.
My boss had told me it was fine to read when the shop I worked in was quiet – but I don’t think this was exactly what he had in mind.
I remember feeling on edge, and worrying that my face (and the tingling feeling in my stomach and toes) would somehow give me away.
It’s funny because I wasn’t actually doing anything wrong but, as this was the very first time I had read an erotic book and I was in a public space, it felt very naughty.
This charged moment happened nearly two decades ago now and luckily, since then, I have gotten past the embarrassment I once felt around reading erotica. In fact, I now realize and fully appreciate just how impactful words can be in arousing the body as well as the mind.
It’s my not-so-secret pleasure – and I urge anyone looking to spice things up in the bedroom, whether alone or with a partner, to give it a go.
However, I can understand why many people are still undecided about it.
These days, most of us have endless options to pleasure ourselves, myself included – from the vibrator by my bed to the raunchy films accessed through my smartphone. But while sex tech and porn are great tools, you should never underestimate the value of a good (dirty) book.
In my mid-20s, I used some tomes in the same way I do sex toys – figuratively speaking, of course – which was admittedly a bit awkward at first.
Partly because holding a book while playing with yourself requires a bit of manoeuvring, but also because sex and reading are two of my big passions and combining them felt wrong somehow.
But unlike porn, which was very hit-and-miss due to the quality and content, a good book always seemed to deliver. In fact, I would often find myself reading my favourite stories over and over again, while masturbating.
And once I got into the swing of things, I accepted that there is nothing wrong with using a fantasy world that an author has created to advance my own pleasure.
Thanks to my then part-time job and staff discount at Waterstones, I began to build quite the collection and I started to read them everywhere; in the park, on the bus, at the café.
And let me tell you, I was very thankful for the invention of e-books, so I no longer needed to worry about cringe-worthy covers like naked men with flowing hair on horses.
Sometimes, by the time I got home, I had to grab my ex for a quickie, just to release the energy I’d spent all day building up.
I’m not alone in my love for the genre either.
A few years ago, over half of British women and a third of men said that they turn to erotic fiction to get aroused.
That’s not very surprising to me, especially given the popularity of shows like Bridgerton and the massive success of the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy, which did help make this genre more mainstream.
I used to be a fan of this series, but now I think it promotes the idea that women need to be ‘virginal’ to deserve love, which I strongly disagree with.
One problem with this genre is that some authors use language that can be unhelpful and unerotic, like the word ‘wetness’ or terms like ‘member’ and ‘shaft’. I believe it’s better to use the correct words for body parts – there’s nothing wrong with using the word penis or vagina.
I understand that some people may find this embarrassing, but in my experience, openly reading explicit material (as I like to call it) can have positive effects in the bedroom, especially as a form of foreplay.
A few years ago, I was lying in bed with a man and reading one such novel when he asked me to read a few lines for fun. I used a sultry voice and did my best to do the words justice, but I never expected how aroused it would make both of us.
We only managed to read a few pages before he grabbed the book and threw it aside, and then proceeded to ‘ravage’ me, using another phrase often found in erotica.
Another former partner and I used to exchange self-written stories via text, describing scenarios where we were the main characters.
So next time you’re thinking of using your favorite sex toy, why not try reading a book instead?
I must admit that I’ve consumed quite a bit of this genre over the years and the excitement I once felt from reading them has diminished somewhat, but I would still recommend it to anyone looking for a new way to experience pleasure.
If I had to suggest an author, it would be Sylvia Day or Karen Rose, the latter of whom combines a crime story with a compelling romance plot (and a bit of sex). Even if their books are not your cup of tea, I assure you there is something out there for everyone.
Just find a book that excites you and then maybe share it with a partner.
Or keep the naughty secret to yourself.
